The path to awakening is a delicate balance of despair, desire and trust, the fulcrum of which is awakened Consciousness. The awakening that took place in this life was a traumatic process that was held together primarily by the grace of the guru. And the catalyst for awakening was the trust in the guru. So there needs to be a heart connection, not a mind-juggle that convinces you that that master teaches something that you feel comfortable with. Wisdom is greater than you are, and may make you feel uncomfortable. Yet it will be healing at the same time. The true guru is the embodiment of pure wisdom, of pure Consciousness, so to sit at his/her feet (where there is no gender, no separation) is a supreme act - perhaps the final action you may perform.

Find that one who takes your heart, and leave your mind only to watch for any betrayal of your pure Heart-trust, which, (only) if the guru is truly a guru, will not occur. If there is a betrayal, then get up off your cushion and run. Otherwise stay and be challenged to the core of your being.

Trust is absolutely vital. It is the bridge that carries you across the chasm of fear. Your true nature is freedom from bondage of all kinds. Fear is most insidious - it sneaks into the heart and creates an apparent division in you. Although this divide is illusory you need the courage to cross it. It is trust that will carry you. Through your trust the grace of the guru manifests. Trust is the intuited knowingness (instead of mental knowledge) that your guru is on the other side, beckoning to you to come across in safety.

I have been blessed twice in this life (and more) to meet masters with whom there was an instant connection. Actually it was overnight before I woke up to the realisation that Shantimayi was the guru that I had been expecting (and that's a whole story in itself); but with Bhim Giri Ji, in India some years later, it was immediate and unexpected. I simply belonged. It was amazing to sit in the presence of a naked man covered with ash as if it is the most natural thing in the world. (Perhaps it is!) Bhim Giri was not contained in his body. I was actually sitting in him. It is the only time in this life to have been totally and tangibly embraced in love. Words are inadequate.

The connection between guru and disciple is not normally chosen by you. The little finite mind cannot wrap itself around the infinite cause. Rather it is the universe conspiring for your awakening that causes such connection. And when you are open and ready, the guru is there. It may take some time before he is revealed, but time is not relevant in this quest for immortality

As Thoreau said: "Any prospect of awakening or coming to life to a dead man makes indifferent all times and places. The place where that may occur is always the same, and indescribably pleasant to all our senses."

(* Since all is grace, "vital" here does not mean "necessity".)

Although I have not been to Rishikesh to see him for perhaps 8 years, Hans Raj Maharajji remains a great soul who has both directly and indirectly transformed this life. Just as my Granddad was my first spiritual mentor, Maharajji had been my Grandguru.

As far as I'm aware, Maharajji didn't teach much, if at all. His presence was his teaching. Although I couldn't express it at the time I met him, he embodied the non-dual (advaita) consciousness that I yearned for. (I was a seeker who didn't know what was being sought, who hadn't even heard of non-duality.)

As I think back to him, our first meeting comes to mind. It was 1996 and I had arrived in Rishikesh to be with Shantimayi – my guru and Maharajji’s disciple. It was my first journey to India, and I was wide-eyed, soaking up the experience like a long forgotten memory.

After a couple of days I was in Maharajji’s ashram, Sacha Dham, doing seva (voluntary work) – slashing scrub with the edge of a spade. Across the ashram I saw a slim, diminutive figure with white beard and matching white robes step out onto the veranda of a small multi-coloured house. I immediately recognised him from a photograph that I had seen previously.

I rushed eagerly across the ashram, excited to meet the man who Shantimayi had described to me as my guru together with her. After I sat on the ground below the veranda I was joined by about half a dozen other people, and Maharajji seemed oblivious to us as he gave what seemed to be menial ashram instructions in Hindi to another man standing with him.

After some minutes Maharajji turned to go inside his house. With an afterthought he looked back at us for the first time, and said in English, “I am going inside now.” As he turned away to leave us his eyes swept over me, and with that a wave of energy coursed over and through me. I wept uncontrollably.

There are no tears now as he turns away this time – only deep gratitude. The universe is a better place for his presence.

With regards to this photo, Shantimayi had invited me to do a couple of photo shoots of them at the ashram. This is one of my favourites. It symbolizes the transmission from Maharajji through Shantimayi to the viewer.

There is a lake so tiny
that a mustard seed would cover it
easily, yet everyone drinks from this lake.

Deer, jackals, rhinoceroses and sea elephants
keep falling into it, falling and dissolving
almost before they have time to be born.

Lalla (14th Century North Indian mystic)

The kingdom of heaven is like a single mustard seed, which a man planted in his field. Even though it is the smallest of seeds, it grows into one of the largest plants. And when it is grown, it is the size of a tree, and birds come to live in its branches.

Jesus (1st Century Middle Eastern master)

The focus remains on Non-duality and spiritual awakening, but with a more "silent" feeling to the overall theme. Also, the WordPress platform allows more etheric thoughts to be expressed more easily if compared to the old HTML static site.

Enjoy!